As you can probably tell, I always have alot of things on my mind. You're probably wondering how between thinking about homework, Dr Pepper, Glee, random song lyrics and trying not too eat too much chocolate, how could I possibly have any room left in my brain right?! Well, somehow I do!
The topic on my brain at this moment is family. Family family and church family. I found a verse today that says, "Friends love through all kinds of weather, and families stick together in all kinds of trouble." Proverbs 17:17. I loooove this verse because I've found it true in my life. Whenever a tragedy happens, everyone acts like your friend. They all want to help, which is completely understandable, but it honestly gets kind of annoying. I've been able to find friends that love me at my lowest points and my highest points. I honestly consider them my family. And my actual family have been together through all kinds of stuff. Of course we fight and argue, but we can always count on each other to be there for one another.
Our church family should be the same way. Everytime I think of a church family I think of the chuch I visited in Germany. Mosaik church. I was looking at the brochure I got from them for really the first time today. On the front page it says, "Kirche wie eine Familie" and for those who aren't as fluent in German as I am (wink wink) it says, "Church as a family". And that's exactly what they were. A family.
I want to be that to others. I want to be the friend they can always count on and that they consider family. I want to contribute to my church family and not expect anything back. I'm going to try my hardest to change my perspective and be that for others.
Proverbs 25:13
Reliable friends who do what they say are like cool drinks in sweltering heat--refreshing!
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Monday, March 28, 2011
They say she's got her daddy's eyes, she hides 'em well behind her momma's smile.
My friend Shelby always says she likes when I write from the heart. So here I go. I'm putting a sad song on repeat and seeing what comes out.
The song I'm playing is called Daddy's Eyes by Jake Coco. It never fails to make me sad and inspired. hehe
It's one of the few songs that actually reminds me of my dad. Lots of time, I try to block him out because it's too painful to think of him, but this song always brings back all of the sensory details I usually forget. It's like I can feel how scratchy his neck would get when he hadn't shaved in a few days, and how I used to rub his head when he needed a haircut and it would feel like carpet. I can feel him giving me a huge "bear hug" as he used to call it. My face would always rub against his neck when he did that and then I would wiggle out of his arms because I couldn't breathe. I can still feel him scratching my back even though his nails weren't as long as mommys and singing the same song he sang me every night for as long as I can remember. One summer when I went to camp we sang the same song and it made me miss him sooo much. I'm still afraid of hearing that song today. We still have all these inspirational signs up in our computer room that my dad used to post to keep himself motivated. I loved when he did that. He was waayyy too ADD to stick with them, so it became a huge family joke in my house. Sometimes I'll still have that same dream I had every night for about a month after my dad died. It's like a montage of events from that awful week. The call we got. All my friends at the hospital. Watching them try to resuscitate him through the window before someone pulled me away. My family huddled together crying in the hospital hallway. Trying to be strong. Two friends bawling in front of the casket at the viewing. Then, I would usually wake up. But it was always like I was another person watching myself. It was weird. It was awful. I'm just ready for it to go away. I hear you never get over death, you just learn to deal with it. I guess writing is one way for me to deal with it. My dad was an amazing writer. Maybe that's one reason I love it so much. It always feels like I'm kinda writing him a letter. Well, this one's for you daddy. Love you.
John 16:22 <3
The song I'm playing is called Daddy's Eyes by Jake Coco. It never fails to make me sad and inspired. hehe
It's one of the few songs that actually reminds me of my dad. Lots of time, I try to block him out because it's too painful to think of him, but this song always brings back all of the sensory details I usually forget. It's like I can feel how scratchy his neck would get when he hadn't shaved in a few days, and how I used to rub his head when he needed a haircut and it would feel like carpet. I can feel him giving me a huge "bear hug" as he used to call it. My face would always rub against his neck when he did that and then I would wiggle out of his arms because I couldn't breathe. I can still feel him scratching my back even though his nails weren't as long as mommys and singing the same song he sang me every night for as long as I can remember. One summer when I went to camp we sang the same song and it made me miss him sooo much. I'm still afraid of hearing that song today. We still have all these inspirational signs up in our computer room that my dad used to post to keep himself motivated. I loved when he did that. He was waayyy too ADD to stick with them, so it became a huge family joke in my house. Sometimes I'll still have that same dream I had every night for about a month after my dad died. It's like a montage of events from that awful week. The call we got. All my friends at the hospital. Watching them try to resuscitate him through the window before someone pulled me away. My family huddled together crying in the hospital hallway. Trying to be strong. Two friends bawling in front of the casket at the viewing. Then, I would usually wake up. But it was always like I was another person watching myself. It was weird. It was awful. I'm just ready for it to go away. I hear you never get over death, you just learn to deal with it. I guess writing is one way for me to deal with it. My dad was an amazing writer. Maybe that's one reason I love it so much. It always feels like I'm kinda writing him a letter. Well, this one's for you daddy. Love you.
John 16:22 <3
Sunday, March 20, 2011
I've got the joy joy joy joy down in my heart, hey!
Child-like faith has been on my mind a lot lately. As you can tell by my blog name, I don't like growing up and getting older. So the idea of child-like faith has always intrigued me. I was actually going to blog about it before I left for Germany, but I'm so glad I didn't! I got to experience it first hand at a church in Germany.
On my birthday, we went to a church that was like one I've never been to before. It was centered around the kids. The kids would sit in the middle of the floor and the adults would sit in a circle around them. The kids would even help with worship.
One of my friends on the trip said, "It's better to see adults worshipping like children than to see children worshipping like adults." I love that. It's soo true. In America, we expect kids to obey in church. We expect them to sit in the pews with their hands in their laps and sing all the words to the hymns. At this church, everyone worshipped like children. Heart abandoned.
Child-like faith trusts. It loves. It accepts you just the way you are.
What I loved most about this church was that they were one big family. They showed the most love I've ever experienced before. They got together to celebrate God first, and each other second. There were no politics, no agendas, just genuine love for each other.
I've noticed that since in Germany it isn't common or cool to be a Christian, church is so much different there. Some people in America just go to church to say that they did or to check that off their monthly checklist, but in Europe, everyone is genuinely excited to be at church. They all just want to worship their Savior. I want to take that back to the States with me. It's all about changing our attitudes about church. It's not just something we have to do. We're there to take some time out of our busy schedule to worship our Creator. Just think about that. We're going to spend time with the one who made us by hand and knows every freckle on our faces. Whenever I think about that, I get so much more excited about church. I get chill bumps.
On my birthday, we went to a church that was like one I've never been to before. It was centered around the kids. The kids would sit in the middle of the floor and the adults would sit in a circle around them. The kids would even help with worship.
One of my friends on the trip said, "It's better to see adults worshipping like children than to see children worshipping like adults." I love that. It's soo true. In America, we expect kids to obey in church. We expect them to sit in the pews with their hands in their laps and sing all the words to the hymns. At this church, everyone worshipped like children. Heart abandoned.
Child-like faith trusts. It loves. It accepts you just the way you are.
What I loved most about this church was that they were one big family. They showed the most love I've ever experienced before. They got together to celebrate God first, and each other second. There were no politics, no agendas, just genuine love for each other.
I've noticed that since in Germany it isn't common or cool to be a Christian, church is so much different there. Some people in America just go to church to say that they did or to check that off their monthly checklist, but in Europe, everyone is genuinely excited to be at church. They all just want to worship their Savior. I want to take that back to the States with me. It's all about changing our attitudes about church. It's not just something we have to do. We're there to take some time out of our busy schedule to worship our Creator. Just think about that. We're going to spend time with the one who made us by hand and knows every freckle on our faces. Whenever I think about that, I get so much more excited about church. I get chill bumps.
This is a brochure from my new favorite church
Matthew 7:12 The Message <33
Monday, March 7, 2011
A deep, deep flood, an ocean flows from you, of deep, deep love, yeah it's filling up the room
A couple months ago, we had to write songs in Bible class. I've always wanted to be a song writer because its something artsy and I've always wanted to be artsy, but I never knew where to start. I guess this was a good time to start. I just found it on my computer. Wanna see it? I knew you would! ;)
You know all my flaws
Yet you never flee
You’ll always be there
Just for me
My heart aches
I’m broken inside
You wrap me up in your arms
And I can’t hide
You’ve poured down your grace
And I’ve caught it like rain
I soak it in
And it covers up the pain
You’ll never leave
You’ll never forsake
I know I can trust you
It won’t be a mistake
You hold my hand
You lead the way
I’ll trust in you
It’ll all be okay
Life isn’t easy
Life isn’t fair
You’re always faithful
And I feel safe in your care
I will trust in you
That is soo true of God's character. I love looking back on things that I've written to see how true it is even on the day I'm reading it. It was just what I needed today.
Psalm 34:18 the Message <3
Sunday, March 6, 2011
All the single ladies, all the single ladies
What do you think of when you hear the word "single"? I think of Beyonce and chocolate.
Well today, I was looking through my new bright pink Message Bible and noticed in the Atopical Index that they had a section titled "Singleness". After doing a double take, I decided to take a look. I wasn't sure what to be prepared for. Break up advice? People who disobeyed God and ended up dying alone?
I didn't find either of the above. Instead, I found great men and women of God who ended up not marrying anyone and serving God with all they had. In our world today, we have this awful fear of never finding anyone to share our lives with. Girls have this incredible expectation to turn into a lady that will marry right after college, pop out a few kids, and stay at home baking cookies. Trust me, I'm not hating. At all. Because yes, I do want to marry. And I do want kids. And I want to own a bakery. But, that's just not for everyone.
1 Corinthians 7 is full of advice on this subject. My favorite verses in this chapter are verses 32-35. They say: I want you to live as free of complications as possible. When you're unmarried, you're free to concentrate on simply pleasing the Master. Marriage involves you in all the nuts and bolts of domestic life and in wanting to please your spouse, leading to so many more demands on your attention. The time and energy that married people spend on caring for and nurturing each other, the unmarried can spend in becoming whole and holy instruments of God. I'm trying to be helpful and make it as easy as possible for you, not make things harder. All I want is for you to be able to develop a way of life in which you can spend plenty of time together with the Master without a lot of distractions.
Usually when people tell you that it's okay to be single and that there is no shame in it, you're usually thinking it's because they never got married and will most likely die alone. Just sayinnn. But after reading some more, and thinking and preparing for my mission trip, I realized it really is okay to be single. It's soo much easier to listen to the Lord and follow His instructions when you're not distracted by a really cute boy. I mean, boys are great, but they are uber distracting. Don't we want to be able to serve God with everything we have in us?
I'm not saying boys are bad or it's bad to get married. Trust me. But just think of how much work in God's Kingdom could get done while we wait for the perfect boy for us. The one God hand picked especially for us. Because, remember, that boy will come for you. And it is okay to be single in the meantime. ;)
Well today, I was looking through my new bright pink Message Bible and noticed in the Atopical Index that they had a section titled "Singleness". After doing a double take, I decided to take a look. I wasn't sure what to be prepared for. Break up advice? People who disobeyed God and ended up dying alone?
I didn't find either of the above. Instead, I found great men and women of God who ended up not marrying anyone and serving God with all they had. In our world today, we have this awful fear of never finding anyone to share our lives with. Girls have this incredible expectation to turn into a lady that will marry right after college, pop out a few kids, and stay at home baking cookies. Trust me, I'm not hating. At all. Because yes, I do want to marry. And I do want kids. And I want to own a bakery. But, that's just not for everyone.
1 Corinthians 7 is full of advice on this subject. My favorite verses in this chapter are verses 32-35. They say: I want you to live as free of complications as possible. When you're unmarried, you're free to concentrate on simply pleasing the Master. Marriage involves you in all the nuts and bolts of domestic life and in wanting to please your spouse, leading to so many more demands on your attention. The time and energy that married people spend on caring for and nurturing each other, the unmarried can spend in becoming whole and holy instruments of God. I'm trying to be helpful and make it as easy as possible for you, not make things harder. All I want is for you to be able to develop a way of life in which you can spend plenty of time together with the Master without a lot of distractions.
Usually when people tell you that it's okay to be single and that there is no shame in it, you're usually thinking it's because they never got married and will most likely die alone. Just sayinnn. But after reading some more, and thinking and preparing for my mission trip, I realized it really is okay to be single. It's soo much easier to listen to the Lord and follow His instructions when you're not distracted by a really cute boy. I mean, boys are great, but they are uber distracting. Don't we want to be able to serve God with everything we have in us?
I'm not saying boys are bad or it's bad to get married. Trust me. But just think of how much work in God's Kingdom could get done while we wait for the perfect boy for us. The one God hand picked especially for us. Because, remember, that boy will come for you. And it is okay to be single in the meantime. ;)
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